[Leo keeps watching them before picking up his relic to do exactly what he said he was going to do: delete his messages. He hadn't intended Rue to see them and it's easy to connect the dots of him just sending his messages into the void of 2am sleeplessness and Rue deciding to randomly come by with bad flavor ice cream.]
[From the kitchen, Rue hums out in response before reappearing in the living room, coming to settle in beside the teen. They hold out a spoon for him.]
I wanted to talk, my love. About your messages.
[Rue makes a gesture to open their arms, if Leo might like to collapse against them with his ice cream, but they will leave it up to him. They know how these conversations go, how difficult it can be to open up about thoughts and feelings that feel unfair to speak, but they will always be ready to wrap him up in their arms, no matter how old he gets.]
I would like to ask you a question, though, if that is alright.
[He takes the spoon easy enough but if he's honest? Nothing sounds all that appetizing right now. Still, he won't be rude. He'll settle a carton of the easiest looking ice cream between his knees and bring it up so he can get some on his spoon.
Though he pauses for only a second at their request before continuing.]
I never thought that in the slightest. We wanted to make a space for you to feel like you could speak up and not face such things alone, and I, perhaps foolishly, felt that we'd accomplished that piece. But if you say it did not help, then I apologize deeply. Profoundly.
[A gentle, apologetic squeeze against his wrist.]
I am very sorry, Leo. Please, if that did not help, what can I do to help ease any of your hurt?
[He feels that squeeze, feels the reassurance and care that comes with it. He takes a slow breath just sort of... sitting there, his hand in their paw between them on the couch.]
Just keep bein' you. I've- Been kind of trying to move on and move past it, y'know? It just... Feels like most of the time I'm stuck.
[If he'll allow it, Rue will close some of the distance between them, just to peck a gentle kiss against his forehead, their feathers lingering there against him.]
I understand. [Their situations are different, but Rue has often felt the shameful hurt of not being able to shake something they are trying to leave behind. Sometimes those wounds just linger.]
Tell me, darling. Everything that you sent me earlier. Please, unload all of here, let me carry some of the weight of everything you've been holding.
[He doesn't fight it at all, instead just... Tired, for the most part. He was really just wanting to send those thoughts out into a void, delete them, and no one be the wiser because he thought at weird don't-trust-your-brain-hours, Rue would have been asleep and not even noticed.]
I just-
This whole place. It's about becoming our 'best selves', and I dunno what that's supposed to be for me. Everyone else seems like they're figuring it out.
[Surprise, sweet son, but Rue is too nocturnal to sleep much through the night.
They offer him a paw to take, if he might like something to hold.]
I understand how difficult it can be to look around you and feel you are off on some entirely different level than the rest of them. To think you're ten steps behind, always, no matter what you do.
It is so easy to compare our lives to the lives of others, but there is only one Leonardo Hamato. The funniest, bravest, kindest teen I know.
[Rue could go on and on. Leo has left such an impact in their life.]
For me, it was a bit of a crisis. I had to reassess who I was and what was most important to me. I had to find the people in my life who aligned with those morals. I had to come to terms with the fact that I did not truly know who I was, something I still struggle with.
[It's not something Rue would normally admit to, but if it helps in the context of this conversation, they will share their own vulnerability with him.]
[He lets out a slow breath, focusing a little. Not blurting out the first thing that comes to mind, really thinking about it.]
Even before Dad made me the leader, I was always keeping an eye out for them. Not like Raph does, Raph-
He's got the big brother protector on lock, I'm not taking that from him. But like. They wanna go out finding a spine-breaking bandit for our first mission, I talk them down to eh, low danger paper thieves. Raph gets separated from us, Dee and Mikey wanna goof, I get them back on track to finding Raph because we can't leave him alone for too long. That kinda thing. So... So it's easier when I know they're all gucci.
[A gentle pet of their paw over his arm, soothing and slow.]
That makes perfect sense to me, Leo. But what about in this place? How do you feel here in Folkmore? Though the trials can be stressful, there is not quite as much danger as it seems there was back home, is that true?
[Well. If Rue's happy then Leo has either been doing things perfectly or doing things absolutely wrong. Or maybe there's just that sad reality their father had other problems.]
[After a lifetime of Leo and his family being the only protectors of the city, here in Folkmore, there is almost the opposite problem.]
So many here were heroes back their own realms, individuals who have dedicated their lives to saving the day. Each with unique strengths and skills of their own. It no longer has to all fall completely upon your and your brothers' shoulders anymore, darling. There are so many who will leap to step in should the need arise.
[He wants to relax, he wants to kick his feet up and say none of this is his problem. Except Hamato blood is thick with heroism and needing to do what he can. Even in this place with its overabundance of heroes at every corner.]
There's gonna be stuff we can do that no one else can though.
Not only just you boys. There will also be Peter, Hunter, Knickolas and I as well. And that is quite the force, if I do say so myself.
[Rue can see it. That stubbornness in their son. It's the same thing they saw in Peter the last time they had this conversation.]
I do not know if he told you himself, but I told Peter that if he no longer wanted to, he did not have to play the role of Spider-Man again. That he did not need to take on every single problem and make it his own.
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No, uh. I'm good, thanks.
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I wanted to talk, my love. About your messages.
[Rue makes a gesture to open their arms, if Leo might like to collapse against them with his ice cream, but they will leave it up to him. They know how these conversations go, how difficult it can be to open up about thoughts and feelings that feel unfair to speak, but they will always be ready to wrap him up in their arms, no matter how old he gets.]
I would like to ask you a question, though, if that is alright.
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Though he pauses for only a second at their request before continuing.]
Sure, go for it. What's up?
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You said that when we all spoke to you before, that it went bad. Is that how you feel that conversation went? That it was bad?
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You guys all got upset and non of us really knew what to do by the end of it. So... yeah, I think it went bad. It didn't really help.
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I never thought that in the slightest. We wanted to make a space for you to feel like you could speak up and not face such things alone, and I, perhaps foolishly, felt that we'd accomplished that piece. But if you say it did not help, then I apologize deeply. Profoundly.
[A gentle, apologetic squeeze against his wrist.]
I am very sorry, Leo. Please, if that did not help, what can I do to help ease any of your hurt?
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Just keep bein' you. I've- Been kind of trying to move on and move past it, y'know? It just... Feels like most of the time I'm stuck.
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I understand. [Their situations are different, but Rue has often felt the shameful hurt of not being able to shake something they are trying to leave behind. Sometimes those wounds just linger.]
Tell me, darling. Everything that you sent me earlier. Please, unload all of here, let me carry some of the weight of everything you've been holding.
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I just-
This whole place. It's about becoming our 'best selves', and I dunno what that's supposed to be for me. Everyone else seems like they're figuring it out.
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They offer him a paw to take, if he might like something to hold.]
I understand how difficult it can be to look around you and feel you are off on some entirely different level than the rest of them. To think you're ten steps behind, always, no matter what you do.
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...And how do you get past it?
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[Rue could go on and on. Leo has left such an impact in their life.]
For me, it was a bit of a crisis. I had to reassess who I was and what was most important to me. I had to find the people in my life who aligned with those morals. I had to come to terms with the fact that I did not truly know who I was, something I still struggle with.
[It's not something Rue would normally admit to, but if it helps in the context of this conversation, they will share their own vulnerability with him.]
What is most important to you, Leo?
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[He thinks on that, nestled in their soft feathers and rubbing at his stub. It's so much, and he feels like he can't ever catch up to everyone else.]
Just... keeping everyone safe. I don't want anyone hurt.
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And what else? What is most important that doesn't relate to anyone else's wellbeing but your own?
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If everyone else is safe and everything, then I can think about myself.
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Are you saying that you rarely think of yourself in such terms, because there are so few times when all of us are truly safe and whole?
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Even before Dad made me the leader, I was always keeping an eye out for them. Not like Raph does, Raph-
He's got the big brother protector on lock, I'm not taking that from him. But like. They wanna go out finding a spine-breaking bandit for our first mission, I talk them down to eh, low danger paper thieves. Raph gets separated from us, Dee and Mikey wanna goof, I get them back on track to finding Raph because we can't leave him alone for too long. That kinda thing. So... So it's easier when I know they're all gucci.
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That makes perfect sense to me, Leo. But what about in this place? How do you feel here in Folkmore? Though the trials can be stressful, there is not quite as much danger as it seems there was back home, is that true?
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...I dunno? Like I keep waiting for the next thing to happen. The downtime's nice, and I love spending time with Peter and my brothers and you but.
How long until we're expected to save this world too?
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[Nothing has ever felt as right to Rue as being a parent to these wonderful teenagers.]
And I understand that fear, worrying about when things will finally tip over, but you know what brings me so much relief whenever I think of it?
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...What does?
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[After a lifetime of Leo and his family being the only protectors of the city, here in Folkmore, there is almost the opposite problem.]
So many here were heroes back their own realms, individuals who have dedicated their lives to saving the day. Each with unique strengths and skills of their own. It no longer has to all fall completely upon your and your brothers' shoulders anymore, darling. There are so many who will leap to step in should the need arise.
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[He wants to relax, he wants to kick his feet up and say none of this is his problem. Except Hamato blood is thick with heroism and needing to do what he can. Even in this place with its overabundance of heroes at every corner.]
There's gonna be stuff we can do that no one else can though.
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[Rue can see it. That stubbornness in their son. It's the same thing they saw in Peter the last time they had this conversation.]
I do not know if he told you himself, but I told Peter that if he no longer wanted to, he did not have to play the role of Spider-Man again. That he did not need to take on every single problem and make it his own.
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Peter had a similar conversation with Rue. He can only imagine it turned out the same way his did when Leo had this talk.]
I told him the same thing. I don't want him stressing if he doesn't have to.
[Peter can still have a normal life back home. Leo and his brothers? They never will considering their whole situation.]
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